Current mood:

tired

why does my ferret cry? i'm only tired
tomorrow.

tomorrow is the day i will jump back with my diet. i bought all these foods, i have salad and spinach in the fridge that is just DYING to go bad, i have two bottles of spray dressing, i have fruit and cottage cheese - even though i can't down that shit without wanting to gag - i have to start my damn diet back up. food is so good but today i went overboard. i just feel so full and fat and i haven't even eaten in a few hours! its like this is permanent. i can't help but stick out my stomach because i just feel so damn full still.

this sucks so much because i could really see this becoming a pattern. i diet for about a week and see good progress. i begin to get bored with the foods i am eating because i have to limit myself to what i eat because A i live with three other people taking up space in the kitchen with their fatty foods and B i don't exactly know all that i can eat that is good for you. but then after a week or so of eating right, i get bored. i get sick thinking about eating yet another salad. and for some reason, my last experience with my tuna (which i normally loved on salads) was wrapped up in a tortilla and i absolutely hated it. it was dry and just....now for some reason gives me a bad taste in my mouth so i don't know if i will be able to eat that. fuck man this fucking sucks. i get bored of my food so i splurge and eat like everything in sight for three days. and then i get to the point i'm at now where i want to try dieting again. i can't keep doing this!!

you know what really sucks? i bought this bag full of veggies, probably no MORE than a month ago. i ate probably half of it, wrapped it up just fine, stuck it back into the fridge. my mom took it out, finds it to be leaking with who knows what because its just cut up vegetables and then we look at the date on the packaging and it says October. I mean what the fuck .. couldn't I sue or something?? Are they allowed to be selling food that is past its expired date unless they mark it down and bring attention to it? whatever.

i'm pissed because i fucking bought this book at micheals for like seven bucks. its like a coloring book except its on black paper and its just neat little designs that are somewhat clear that you color in and you're supposed to be able to put it up to a window and when sunlight shines through and its like stained glass. well i bought it, bought markers and tried it and it looks like crap. my mom says maybe because the markers are washable. so i try non-washable markers. no better looking. then i spend 13 bucks at plaza and buy 5 prisma markers. NOT A GODAMN DIFFERENCE. what a waste of fucking money. i feel so ripped off. i'm sick of feeling ripped off!!

god i need to go to bed. someone pull me away from this thing. does anyone remember when i had deadjournal and i would write fucking books? well i think i'm about to create that again. except my journal will be alive! ha ha get it? man am i bad


hey UPDATE!! i plan to bring in my camcorder to work tomorrow and just mess around recording the babies and whatnot, making them laugh and watching them do stupid shit and maybe i will put it up on youtube. i saw laughing baby on youtube and its hilarious and it kinda reminds me of this thing i do with annabel (bella) at work. she sits on the ground and i kind of work out/dance around her, kicking my feet up towards the back of my knees and she just CRACKS UP!!! and shes so adorable about it because she moves her head all around and covers her face and damn, its just the CUTEST little thing you've ever seen. so i really hope i can get some footage of that and show the world the cutest little baby ever. hopefully mommy doesn't mind. i talked to casey about it and said parents would probably never even know. then i talked to angie (co worker) about it and said as long as its not bad stuff of the baby they probably wouldn't mind. i hope not! i don't want to get any parents mad at me. i mean, can you imagine? you have a kid and one day you see them on youtube and you have no knowledge of this? ack! crazy. alright well i better go rest my brain before it explodes with words that do not make any sense to you earthlings.
later